JBDBIBBaerman

I finish on June 9th.

If all toasters truely toast toast, then wouldn't toasted toast be cooked. If not toasted, then it is raw. Is there any meat you should eat raw? No! So if all toasters toast toast, don't risk it. Tapeworms are an ever-increasing problem. Be wary. Always toast your toast.

I believe that the "ghosts" are demons, so sort-of.

I'm sorry to hear that! I'll keep your family in my prayers tonight. God bless!

It won't. As others said, the * willl. The calculator takes letters as variables, so that would include 'x'.

Helpfully

Sorry, but you're a goner. 

Since we do not have a value for x, we simply have 2x²(for those who can't see the formatting, 2x^2). Why? Take 2*2. What is 2*2? 4! But it is also the same as 2²( or 2^2). Since we don't know x, we can simply write it as x²(or, as you know, x^2). 

Awesome joke.